So last Thursday was a good day. After working Sunday through Wednesday, I finally got a day off. And not just half a day off, but the full day. The whole thing. It was amazing. So I decided to go to the Thursday night "Ohana Community Gathering" at YWAM. I left shortly after it started to go see Slumdog Millionaire. But that's beside the point. In that short time that I was at the meeting, there was worship, some prayer, and the speaker started to speak. I really only got a small tiny smidgen of what he was talking about, but what he said struck a chord in my heart that totally ruined me. In a good way.

"The church in Acts is not what we should aspire to become. The church in Acts was the church in its infancy." Wow. We look at the Bible and read the book of Acts and read about tongues, flames on their heads, sings and wonders, miracles, healings, etc... and we think "wow, look at them. They are awesome. They are so holy. And godly." yes they were. But they were "infants," so to speak. They were the very beginnings of the Church. Flash forward 2000 years. Where are we now? We are bickering about whether speaking in tongues is spiritually "ok." We're arguing about whether or not we should be prophecying in the church. Or worse, we aren't addressing these issues at all. WHY NOT!?! God gave those to us as gifts. So use them! haha.

But here we are. 2000 years later. and it seems that we've digressed to a pre-infant state of mind. Where tongues is off limits. Where prophecy is a "oh-so-holy act." Geez luize. Get with it. come on. Grow up!

Joining the Ranks of the Employed Citizens of the United States

i got a job. it's great. i'm gonna be working at a japanese restaurant as a kitchen helper. so i'm gonna start off as a dish washer, then they'll be training me to make like.. some foods. maybe tempura. maybe salads. i dunno.

but the thing about this whole situation is that i've been having doubts. i've been in kona for over a month, searching for a job. searching for the opportunity to make money, to fly back out to australia. but after searching and searching, i wasn't having any success. i just was hanging out. sitting. vegging out. and i was like, where is my job? why hasn't God given me a job yet? why didn't he provide for me? i got into this rut. i was getting angry. upset. stupid. and i was blaming God. but then i realized... i hadn't even asked God to give me a job. i was like, hmm... maybe i should ask. so i did. and i said. God, please help me get a job. and a few days later, i got a call from Genki sushi for a job interview, which i'm going to later today, and then i stumbled over this ad in the paper saying that a restaurant was hiring. and so i went to apply. and... i got a job.

so the reason for sharing this, is that at church on sunday, the pastor said that oftentimes we forget to tell others about God's goodness to us. Like the lepers. the ten of them. when Jesus healed them, only one came back. why not all? cause only one remembered to turn and glorify God with his words. so that's what i'm doing. just... yeah. that.

but on that note, why don't we tell everyone about what God has done for us? are we ashamed? embarrased? or just don't see it as such a big deal? i mean, there are so many other things that we tell people about almost immediately after it happens. example. i was driving home the other day. on one of the little terraces along the side of the road there was this guy bent over. he had his back to the road. and then it hit me. like a bird hits a glass window on a clear sunny day. or... i dunno. i can't think of any witty analogies. but it hit me. what hit me? well. the guy was mooning people along the side of the road as the passed. as soon as i got home, i texted a friend like "dude, this guy totally just mooned me as i was driving. haha" why was that so important? why was it that almost immediately i had the urge to tell someone about it? i dunno. why don't i react that way when God's promises come true? hmmm. food for thought.

Obey Dammit!

Do you ever have those moments when you think of something that you should do. Like... not, "oh I should go and change my toothbrush today." But times when you have to make a decision? For example, you're sitting at a table, minding your own business, when someone who was walking by trips and drops everything they are holding. At this point you have a couple different options. 1) get up and help the person gather his/her things, and then send him/her on his/her way. Or 2) think, " gee, what a shame. Someone should help them," and then turn back to what you are doing. You know, not you think, but you know for a fact that the better thing to do would be option 1. But you vacillate between thoughts of "alright if nobody else gets up, I'll help him. Get off your lazy butt and go help him. But... I'm really too lazy too... But, on the other hand, it'd be the right thing to do." And so you think "alright, I'm gonna help." But he's already gathered his things and started to leave. Or worse yet, somebody else has gotten up and started to help, thus making you feel like a shmuck for not being the person to help.

This happens to me so much. But not in this kind of situation. The situations that it happens to me are in situations of obedience to the Big Man Upstairs. Example is as follows. I was sitting... standing in the prayer room at the YWAM base. They were praying and interceding for Amsterdam, one of the teams here is going there for outreach. I almost immediately got a word from Ezekiel about God telling Ezekiel to breath life into the bones. To prophecy the breath into the bones to make them come alive. But I didn’t go and share it. I didn’t get the chance to. I was waiting around for too long to get to do it. I was thinking “Well, this is YWAM, everyone hears the cliche word that '(insert location here) is dead, and we need to breath life into it.' So I justs feel dumb for sharing.” So I didn’t share. So, God had someone else do it for me. And I realized, God won’t wait for you to obey. I mean, to an extent he will. But if you aren’t willing to step out and speak His words, he’ll use someone else to get the message across.

God wants to use you. Use me. But if we're not bold enough to say, "Ok, I don't care what people think. Let's do it." then God won't be able to use you. Sure you can do stuff, but not nearly to the magnitude of what God has for us. He wants to use us. He wants us to glorify Him by obeying what He tell us. But when we're too lazy, insecure, or just plain stubborn, nothing is gonna happen. God's not gonna let your stubborness and lack of willingness to step out in faith hinder His work. So if you don't act, He'll use somebody who will. But He so desperately wants to use you. Use me. So why not help it along by not being so stubborn and self concious? Haha. That's my little, rant for the day. It was fun.

Plateau.

This is a little long. I know. But i started writing this as more of a journal entry in this thing i write in for my quiet times and stuff, but i thought, hmm, i'll share it. So here it is.

“What if. when he was done with this masterpiece, R. had announced that there was no more need for anyone to paint, because he had just painted the ultimate painting?...Keep exploring, keep arranging, and forming and bringing in new perspectives.”
Rob Bell used this as a comparison to followers of Christ. We always are continuing to seek after God. Finding new ways to worship. “...exploring what it means to live in harmony with God and each other. The Christian faith tradition is filled with change and growth and transformation. Jesus took part in this process by calling people to rethink faith and the Bible and hope and love and everything else, and by inviting them into the endless process of working out how to live as God created us to live.”

Now, the trouble I have with this, is that yes, as a whole, followers of Christ are seeking new ways, seeking to further their relationships... But, what bothers me is that I don’t see that on a more personal level. Why do we reduce ourselves to such a low point where we just simply hang out, and in a sense “plateau?” To plateau is to “reach a state of little or no change after a time of activity or progress.” The noun form of the word is “a state of little or no change following a period of activity or progress.” It sounds good. But the key word here is level. It is yes, a high point, but a level point. That means no increase. no decrease. In my guitar playing and other aspects of music, I’ve “plateaued.” There are a few reasons I’ve plateaued.

The first reason is that I no longer play music with anyone else. Not that I don’t want to, I just don’t. The opportunity hasn’t really presented itself much, and so I just don’t. When you don’t play with other musicians, you start to flounder. There is nobody to feed off of. Nobody to play off of. Sure you can mix a few tracks and play along with a recording, but what fun is that? The biggest factor in playing by yourself is that you have nobody to challenge you. When you are playing music by yourself, it is far easier to become content with being, average. But when playing with other people, they challenge you to strive to be better. To try and “better” each other. And so when you only play music with yourself and a computer with a shoddy microphone, you start to become content with where you are, and don’t strive to get better.

The second reason is when you lose the discipline to practice(or in my case never get it at all). “Practice makes perfect.” We’ve all heard this. And I think it’s a bit of a farce. Nothing can ever be perfect. However, it can get better. Practicing improves your skill. Whether it be music, sports, or cooking. Practicing makes you better at what you do. I don’t practice. So therefore I do not get better. I fiddle around with different chords and learn a new song every once in a while, but I lack the discipline and self control to fully commit myself to learning, and practicing not just new things, but reinforcing the foundations. Just because you’ve learned something doesn’t mean that you have mastered it. Heck, I’ve been playing violin for over 13 years, but I still make little mistakes that you learn in the first week of learning the violin. Like... how to take care of an instrument. Don’t leave it lying on the ground. Don’t whip it around like a ragdoll. Don’t play swords with the violin bow. Unless you commit to having self control and have the discipline to practice, and to really get grounded in the foundations, you can’t really get too far.

And finally, the biggest reason I have plateaued in m music life, is because I no longer have the same vigor and passion for it as I once did. When I started playing music, I loved it. I practiced hours a day. I was so excited to learn new things. I practiced the basics because I knew that if I was to go to Juilliard School of Music, play in Carnegie Hall in New York with the likes of Isaac Stern, Itzhak Perlman, and Yo Yo Ma, and be a violin virtuoso, I needed to practice. And I loved it. I loved everything about it. But as I grew older, my passion for it faded. I still liked music, even loved it, but not with the same intensity as I used to. Maybe I’ll go to Juilliard... or maybe I’ll pursue business. Or art. Or hotel management. Maybe I’ll play violin, or maybe I’ll play soccer. There is nothing wrong with any of these things, but it isn’t where my passion lies. Well, used to lay. Without the passion and love for what you do, you will do, good things. Pretty cool things. But with the vigor, passion, and intensity that could be going into it, you could do great things. Spectacular things. Mind boggling things.

So why have we as followers of Christ “plateaued” in our relationship with our Creator and Savior? Because one, maybe we don’t surround ourselves with other believers that will help us grow. That we can “play off of.” That challenge us. Without other believers, yes, it is very possible to love God and grow, but with them, we strengthen our faith, as well as theirs through community.

Why have we as followers of Christ “plateaued?” Because we lack the self discipline and self control to really press into Him. To look to His Word for guidance. To work on the basics. We have problems really loving our friends, our family, our God. If we can’t love the one who created us, gave us life, gave us a hope, and loves us with an everlasting love... how will we then love our enemies as He calls us to? How are we to love God in the hard times? In the sad times? How are we to maintain a life that is glorifying to God when we can’t even do the one thing that we were truly created to do, and that is to love our God and worship Him.

Why have we as followers of Christ “plateaued?” Because that first love is not there like it used to be. Yes, we still love God. Yes, we still wanna serve Him. But not quite like we once did. As a child we would always want to put something in the offering plate as it when by, even if it was just a penny or two. We always wanted to go to church and hear stories about God’s awesome power and people getting swallowed whole by giant fish(or maybe we just wanted to play). We never doubted God. He was always there. Remember that song? My God is so big, so strong and so mighty there’s nothing that my God cannot do... well what happened? We started to doubt a little. Maybe we just didn’t care. We knew he was there. We knew he loved us. But did we love him and adore him in the same way he did? No. Can we? No. But we can try. We can love him with all we have. But so often we don’t. We love him with 2 days a week. Church and youthgroup. We love him in 45 minutes a day at the morning times that we like to call “quiet times.” We now like God more than we love him.

But why do we do this to Him? Why do we not want to spend time, earnestly seeking His face? I don’t know. I wish I did.

Punched.

So since I've been back in Hawaii, I've seen friends, ate a lot of great food, had some laughs, had some.. well, no cries yet, but you never know. They might come. But I've realised a lot being here, and not Malaysia. In life, so many things are taken for granted. For example; in Malaysia we have McDelivery. Yes, delivery for McDonalds. Here in Hawaii, we do not. But in all seriousness, I've realised that so much of the time you don't recognise what you really have until you are without it. Basic things like McDelivery, or easy transportation, to other things like deep meaningful relationships with people that you really trust, honor, and respect. Yes, those relationships aren't just broken when you leave or part ways, but there is something that changes. Also, when you go to live somewhere foreign to you, you realise how much you rely on simple treasures in life. Hot water for example. Consistent electricity. Air-conditioning. And the privilege of being able to go to sleep without having to worry about mosquitoes, spiders, centipedes, and other creatures crawling into bed with you and then leaving the next morning like a one night stand.

But so often we do overlook these things. We take them for granted. We see them as things that we are entitled to and don't appreciate them. We jump for the big things. Like, having a really good job that we can make lots of money and gain respect from. We study hard to have the best grades in school to achieve academic recognition. We strive to have the best things. That phrase "he who dies with the most toys wins" has become so evident in our lives. Life is now about personal gain. And that's not wrong. But we just always want to see how high we can put ourselves, and how much we can love ourselves. And how much other people can love us. We try to milk the joys out of life. But as we do this, we simply miss out on everything else that this world has to offer us. Like walking around in the sun. Pop tarts and bagel bites. Back scratches. And hot showers.

So. i don't really know what the point of all this was. but. I'll try to leave it with a tasty one liner. Don't overlook life's small joys while searching for the big ones.

And here's a little joy that I found.